A Tribute

There has been a moment of realization and deep understanding in my life that I cannot properly describe. It happened yesterday and it has confirmed how blessed I am to have my wife in my life. Maybe I should start by talking of her and then, if words come, I can describe what this moment of learning is all about.

My wife Silvana was born in Asti, in the north west region of Piedmont, Italy. She is the third of five siblings born to two loving parents, Gino and Grazia, originally from Corleto Monforte, a small town not far from Salerno and the Amalfi Coast in the southern part of the boot, one of the most beautiful regions of Italy.

Gino and Grazia moved to Asti in 1956, right after their marriage, and other members of their family joined them for a new life in the north. I guess we could say that the pioneer seed in Silvana’s parents was also transmitted to their children as all of them, eventually, moved for other hopeful big and better adventures.

Silvana showed much independence at a very young age. After middle school, she decided she wanted to learn the beautician’s trade and the ins and outs of business. She was very determined and successful and easily found employment after graduating. School and employment required her daily commute from Asti to Torino and Alessandria. It must have taken a lot of courage for her (and her parents) to do this beginning at the age of 15 and continuing throughout the years. But she had the passion and the willingness and when you have the passion and the willingness, sacrifice becomes easier. At some point she felt she needed to begin her own business and opened a salon in her hometown. Very skilled at what she did, Silvana became very successful.

Silvana and I had met in Switzerland in 1979 at a church youth conference. We became good friends but, being one thousand miles apart, we could only use the regular mail service and the expensive telephone to be in touch and communicate. So, it was mostly through letters that we learned to get to know each other. Two years later I asked her to be my wife and she accepted. Yes, I was excited but the excitement of the time pales at the deep appreciation and love I have developed for this very special person, including the wisdom that she has brought into my life and that of my family.

My parents loved her as soon as they saw her but it took many years before Silvana and I could actually get married. When that happened, more than 30 years ago now, it opened a new chapter in our lives that has become a huge adventure.

Silvana is a fighter and one that truly cares for those she loves. Together we have been through a lot. I heard people say that we look like a very successful couple and that we are well off. The appearance of things does not mean the reality of things. If by successful people mean that we get along and have a good family and we have some stability in our life, then we are successful. As to being well off, well far from it. But our richness is in our relationship and our relationship with our children.

The fact is that our life is the product of blood, sweat, and tears. And yes, some times those tears are tears of joy and I feel that the blood and sweat we have poured to get them were worth it. Despite all of this, Silvana has always come strong out of any challenge. We have faced health, financial, emotional, and many other challenges but Silvana has always pulled herself up stronger and stronger. The other day I felt so blessed to have her into my life that I told her that I would live this life with her all over again, with no hesitation.

The other day, I was struggling with thoughts about my future and I felt as if I was still lingering in the past, on all that blood, sweat, and sad tears that I shed over so many years. And there she was, my wife, reminding me again of the reality of life and of the opportunity I still have to make a difference in my life and in the lives of others. I was angry and upset at myself for thinking of the negative stuff rather than the positive accomplishments of my and our life. After thinking about Silvana’s words and attitude, I realized how successful I am just for the reason to have spent almost forty years in her company. She is beautiful in my eyes and in the eyes of many. But to me, she is the most beautiful person inside. I am the lucky one.